The Ultimate Test
by madeleine68
Summary: Olivia's first job. Slight AU. Oneshot.


**Disclaimer: If you've seen them on the show, they're not mine.**

**This is a oneshot of what might have been Olivia's first job at SVU (before the first episode). Slight AU.**

**Please review! Reviews always make my day. Now . . . enjoy the story!**

Ever since I found out I was a product of rape, I knew that when I grew up, I was going to help people like my mom and I. I was going to try to make sure no kid ever had to go through what I went through as a child. I was a reminder of the worst night of my mother's entire life and she never let me forget it.

When kids are little they want to save the world. I was no different, except that my dream was always more concrete. I was going to be a police officer and help put away the bad guys. I was going to help women like my mom who'd been violated in the worst way possible and children like me who had to grow up as that constant, awful reminder.

So here I am now, fresh out of the police academy and ready for my first job at the special victims unit precinct of the New York police force. I scuff my shoe nervously as I wait in my new captain's office. His name is Captain Cragen. He told me to wait here while he went to get my new partner, whose name is Elliot Stabler. I clasp my hands anxiously as I wait. I don't know why I'm so nervous, except that this is one of the most significant days of my life. There's that sense of foreboding, that this is going to have a major impact on my future. This is the ultimate test. Can I handle it?

The captain opens the door and I snap out of my worries. With him is a tall, muscular man with clear blue eyes. I assume that this is my partner, Elliot.

"Detective Benson, this is your partner, Detective Elliot Stabler," says Captain Cragen. "Elliot, this is Detective Olivia Benson."

Elliot gives me a friendly smile and holds his hand out. I take it. His handshake is firm and makes me feel immediately at ease. "It's nice to meet you," I say politely.

"Welcome to the 'shades of grey' squad," he tells me.

I give him a small smile in return. He gestures for me to follow him out into the squad room and introduces me to the rest of the detectives. "This is John Munch," he says, pointing to a thin, older man with graying hair. "And this is Monique Jeffries."

I shake hands with both of them, albeit uneasily. I've entered a whole new world and I'm not entirely sure if I can cope with it.

We chat for a bit and the other detectives explain to me the ins and outs of working with SVU. It's very different from working with any other section of the NYPD. It's all about the victims and getting them justice at all costs.

* * *

The next morning, I arrive at the precinct at 8:00. Detectives Munch and Jeffries are already there, but Elliot is late. I sit nervously at my new desk, crossing my right leg over my left and clasping my hands in my lap, unsure what to do.

Elliot rushes in a moment later carrying two cups of coffee. He hands one to me and I take it in surprise. "Thanks."

"Sorry I'm late," he apologizes. "I got stuck in traffic."

Captain Cragen pokes his head out of his office. "Elliot, we caught a case. Seven-year-old raped by her mother's boyfriend. Take Monique with you."

Elliot glances at me, a questioning look on his face. I take a deep breath "I can go."

Captain Cragen raises his eyebrows. "Are you sure?"

This is the ultimate test. If I can handle this, she can handle SVU. If I can't, then I'm in the wrong line of work. "I'm sure."

"Okay," agrees the captain. "Go with Elliot."

I grab my coat and follow my partner into his car. Elliot turns on the car and pulls out of the parking lot. "You know, Olivia, this is going to be a tough case. It's always hard at the beginning and it's especially hard when the vic is a kid. If you need to take a moment, you can."

"I'll be fine," I tell him, hoping he can't hear my pounding heart, because in actuality I'm not sure.

We reach Mercy General Hospital and go inside. A nurse leads us to a room where a seven-year-old girl is lying on the bed with tears in her eyes. A dark haired woman who I assume is her mother is perched on the edge of her bed, stroking her hand. My heart immediately goes out to the two of them. Their lives as they know it have just ended.

Instinctively, I know what to do. Swallowing the bile that's forming in my throat, I do the one thing I would have wanted someone to do for me. I sit down next to the girl. "Hi, sweetie," I say gently. "I'm Olivia and this is my friend, Elliot. What's your name?"

She looks up at me through wet blue eyes and whispers, "Emily."

"Emily," I say, managing a smile. "That's a pretty name. It's nice to meet you, Emily."

She gives me a small smile in return.

"Emily," says Elliot, sitting down in a chair next to her bed. "Do you know why we're here?"

Tears rush to the little girl's eyes again as she nods. "'Cause of what happened last night."

"What happened last night?" I ask her gently.

"My bastard boyfriend went into her room," her mother starts, but Elliot puts up his hand to stop her.

"I'm sorry, ma'am, but we need to hear it from Emily."

"Gordon came into my bedroom when I was sleeping," whispers Emily. "He woke me up and he told me we were going to play a game." She glances at her mother, then turns back to me, looking right into my eyes as she continues, "He made me pull down my pants and he touched me where Mommy says people shouldn't." She lets out a strangled sob. "It hurt!"

This is one tough seven-year-old. I'm actually surprised she's kept her composure thus far. I'm a grown woman and I don't think I'd be able to handle myself that well in such a situation. I do the only thing I can do and put a comforting arm on her shoulder. "You're a very brave girl," I tell her.

She sighs and lays her head back down on her pillow as if she's too drained to even respond. "I'm tired. Can I go to sleep now?"

"Sure," I say.

"Please arrest the bastard," says Emily's mother vehemently, squeezing her daughter's hand.

Elliot nods. "Thank you for talking to us."

We get up and leave the hospital. My face is white and my hands are shaking as we exit the building. There are so many sick people in the world.

I run over to the side of the road and vomit, my disgust physicalizing itself in my stomach. I heave until my stomach is empty and then I turn back to Elliot guiltily. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay," he assures me. "And you're a natural with the victims. The first one's always the toughest."

I nod shakily, dismissing the compliment and focusing on the last part. "I'll get used to it."

He shakes his head. "When that happens, transfer out."

But I've passed the test. SVU is where I belong.

**I hope you liked this little oneshot. Please review and tell me!**


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